monster under the bed

When I was a little girl, a monster lived under my bed. He was mean, vicious, had sharp teeth and bad breath. He breathed fire and sometimes his dark, feathery wings seeped out from under the box spring.  One Tuesday night, a clawed talon reached out and snagged a pink sock. I heard munching noises and a small burp as he gorged on the ribbed cotton material. I never saw that sock again. The next night, the other sock disappeared. Try explaining to your mother why all your socks disappeared over time. She never believed me, and I'm sure to this day, she still doesn't.

I called my under the bed monster Glog, (Ok, I was eight).

I wholeheartedly believed if I kept my arms and legs from hanging off the side, and tucked under the covers, Glog could not get to me. He was smart though, and clever. At dusk he would try to pull the covers off the bed, to the floor, knowing I would have to get on the floor to pull the blankets back on the bed. He could get me then. He could get me when I wasn't covered up. Even though Glog was tricky, I outsmarted him. I eventually learned how to tuck all the blankets under the mattress corner, so he couldn't pull them off the bed.   Then, after I pulled the blankets back onto me, I tucked them around me, creating a moat, so I was on my own little island. It was genius! For some reason an eight year old was able to out-smart a centuries old monster.

As I considered how to rid my room of Glog, I figured if he did not have a place to live, he would have to leave my house, and he would no longer frighten me. So I devised a plan. I stuffed everything I owned under the bed. Shoes, coats, clothes, blankets, my little brother, (ok, not really him, but some of his stuff). I collected things from the yard, the kitchen, even the garage. I think I put an old bicycle tire under there, and most likely a coffee can or two. My plan was working. Glog surely had no place to live down there. With all the junk under the bed, he could not possibly breath or move. I was pretty sure he moved out. I was sure to keep my feet on the bed though, and well hidden under the covers, just in case.

However, my plan was soon foiled. My mother vacuumed my room one day, and discovered the junk and debris under the bed. Oh boy did I get in trouble. Have you ever tried to explain why your little brother's favorite shirt is under your bed, or the dog's missing water bowl? Or why there is a hammer and a box of construction nails under the bed? Not fun, and especially not fun when your mother finds two full cans of premium coffee, pilfered from her kitchen when she wasn't looking. I still remember the look on her face when she discovered everything. I think it was somewhere between horror and pure anger.

When you are eight, everything seems exaggerated, and distorted. Things are bigger and wider, and longer. As we grow up, and return to places we visited as a child, things are no longer big, but seem somehow small and somewhat diminished. Time has a way of filtering emotions and memories, but I vividly remember my mother being very upset with me, and I got in a lot of trouble. As I try to recall this incident, I can remember everything that happened up until this point. I don't remember the exact words she used, or my punishment, but I remember it was severe and long. I think I was grounded for more than a month. And the worst part of it was, I had to clean all the stuff out from under the bed. My safety net, my security - was gone.

Glog would now to return to his home under my bed, and I was sure he would bring some of his friends over to my room from my little brother's room. I think they had some sort of secret meeting place during the day. A place where all the house monsters would meet for coffee and donuts (or mice and moths, or whatever house monsters ate) and a good laugh at how they scared all of us the night before. I'm pretty sure the meeting place was the basement. More specifically the laundry room, or the space under the stairs. I could never decide which was more scary.

Next blog.... how I finally killed Glog.